Hard Week, Broken But Still Grateful

November 22, 2018

On Friday I went to school with my voice sounding like I was a chain smoker. It wasn’t sore nor did I feel bad in any way other than just tired. That tired things seems to be a common thing for me as I over work myself keeping up.
By Saturday I wasn’t feeling well at all so I though I’ll jump ahead of whatever this is and go to Carenow. I did, no to Flu, no to a common cold but they agreed something wasn’t normal with my lungs. The coughing was bad. She put me on antibiotics, cough medicine and oh rest. Rest! I have custom orders lined up in my studio that have to be done by Monday. Off I went to ignore the rest part. Meds filled, lots of water and to my studio to work. Saturday was uneventful just working on orders due on Monday. I hit Sunday and wow who pulled the rug out from under my feet. I started the morning with a 100.5 fever and as the day passed it went up and down and back up again. No gym on Monday but I had to work and finish up these orders. I wanted them to have their pieces for the holiday. I’m not kidding when I say I laid on the kitchen floor with a pillow. I would rest then paint repeating that over and over. Orders delayed until Tuesday my heart was breaking I like to keep my promise. Tuesday we delivered the orders to Doc’s and as we left my thought now I can rest.

BHL

Halfway home my phone goes off. It’s Waco we need stuff and we need it yesterday. What I thought was home to rest was home to load and Prepare for a trip on Wednesday. I managed to get Greg to go with me so he could drive and I could sleep. It wasn’t the rest I needed but it was rest. We arrived in Waco and Cameron’s was hit hard I didn’t realize just how hard. I loaded in the store what I had brought. We grabbed a bit to eat then it was back to Dallas. Before we reached home we stopped to grab the things I needed for my Thanksgiving dishes. I got home and crawled into bed there I stayed until Thursday.

BHL

Waking up early today on Thanksgiving gave me quite time in the house. Greg and the puppies were still asleep. I was thinking how disappointed I was that my week didn’t go as planned. I’m moving into a new work place. I had planned on having that done my Tuesday. It’s still yet to be done and tomorrow is Friday. As frustration built up in my heart I started to cry. The reality of my heart took over and said why are you crying. You have so much to be grateful for with family, friends, Health, life the goes on and on. Sometimes it’s hard to be grateful when we focus on the way we want things and not the way they play out. We all walk in frustration because of one thing or another. We spend hours thinking why is this happening, I don’t deserve this. Look at everyone else life it looks so perfect. No one’s life is perfect. Money issues, family drama, heartbreak over friendships lost, job you hate or is taken away it all adds up in our heart. We begin to look for ways to cover the pain. Some with substance abuse, some with anger, some withdrawn and there’s me who overworks every part of my life. If for only a moment we could rise above it all. Decide to grow where God has planted us.

BHL

I’m jumping on the grateful train.  Life is full of blessings that we all have.  We only need to press our chins high into the air and look.  Sometimes we have to really look because we are weighed down from the frustration.  I promise those blessings never left you.  Blessings have been their all along.  I have until the 30th to clear out the old place.  Business is good and so what if it’s not as full as I wished it was.  Breath and let go, just breath and let go.  Look and find your blessings today.  It’s a day of Thanksgiving, counting blessings and just being grateful.

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